Dancin' Fool

 Hey, if he can do it, so can I! Look at that grin, that wagging tail, don't tell me he's just doing it for kibble.

Now it can be told—Yours Truly has become a dancin' fool. Lucky enough to live about a block from the Club Deportivo, where once I bought a year's membership for $15 all the classes and activities are free, I couldn't resist signing up for ballroom dance on Thursdays and line dancing on Fridays. And I'm taking tai chi on Tuesdays, which the instructor also refers to as a "dance." Well, it certainly doesn't feel like a martial art.


Maybe I'm overdoing it, but I have a lot of catch-up to do.  I haven't done any kind of disciplined dancing since I was fourteen and my mom signed me up for Arthur Murray. I'm from the California "get out there and move like a wild thang" school of dance, with a little very unstructured West Coast Swing thrown in. Counting steps, moving in time with a partner, take special motor skills that I'm convinced are good for my brain. The line dancing, in particular, is challenging, especially when I've got my back to the instructor and I'm peering over my shoulder to see what she's doing next. Even more challenging because she taught us nearly a dozen different dances in a ninety minute session! The only one I caught onto right away was the Macarena. But what a workout!


The ballroom class is taught by a professional instructor, and because I don't have a partner, I get to dance with her husband, an affable guy about a head shorter than me, who reminds me of Mickey Rooney. He knows all the steps, so it's like having my own private coach. We've started with Rumba, West Coast Swing and Cha Cha and will be going on to Samba! Can't wait!

Hardest of all for me is Tai Chi. Maybe because there's no music, no beat. But the movements are graceful, and very disciplined, down to the position of the hands. And I love the names of the movements: Parting the Wild Horse's Mane, Picking Up the Golden Needle From the Bottom of the Ocean, White Crane Spreads Its Wings...  Now all I need is some pink silk pajamas!

Chances are I may never have a chance to use these new abilities out there in the Real World, and I have no expectations of becoming an expert, but I'm enjoying the process anyway. I'm having so much fun my face hurts from smiling. And if the band starts up a Samba, and somebody looks my way, I'll be ready to dance. No wallflower, I.

Lakshimi at your service

The serenely smiling four-armed lady sitting on a lotus in a lake of gold coins is Lakshimi, "the Eternal Goddess of Wealth & Prosperity." She was introduced to me by my friend Jan, just when I was feeling a major financial pinch this month and looking for a little serenity of my own. Everything I have undertaken in January has ended up costing more than I was originally quoted, from the ramada and flood control project to car repair and purchase of a daybed in the fervent hope that my son will visit.

I Googled Lakshimi, and was informed that the mere sight (or darshan) of her in the morning would bless me with wealth. I was advised to keep her picture in my purse, and I would "never face shortage of resources." That would be nice. I'm not wishing for fabulous wealth, but I wouldn't mind being able to meet the budget I've spent hours working out. And maybe that trip...

The entire back of my place is now a classic example of Earth in Upheaval. Piles of sand and stones, big holes in the ground revealing water pipes that we somehow have to protect and preserve access to, bags of cement... Not a serenity-inducing scene. 

The ultimate goal is a roof extending over the entire back patio that will carry rainfall over and out into a canal which will pass around my condo and the one next door, and into the arroyo. A stone wall will block water flow from the parking lot (which is seven feet higher than my patio), with a metal gate that can be bolted shut against rising water, and a little bridge over the canal leading from my back steps to the parking lot.

Every time I begin asking myself if I really need all this, it rains—torrentially—and I'm back to mopping and sopping up the flow under my back door with towels. Last night was relatively mild, only a four-towel night.

Anyway, back to Lakshimi. After jumping into an ocean of milk when the gods were exiled, she was reborn and was so admired for her beauty (must have been all that milk) she was chosen to become the consort of Vishnu. She signifies not only wealth and prosperity but light, beauty, love and grace. To obtain her help (better take notes here) requires 100,000 japa or recitations of her mantra and 10,000 ahutis (offerings) of ghee (clarified butter) and samigri (a combination of 36 purifying herbs). Um, is that daily?

 

And here she is at her rebirth, dancing on a lotus floating on that ocean of milk, surrounded by... wait, can that be right? Pink elephants? Are we sure it was milk and not piña coladas?

Beauty and the Boots

ABC WEDNESDAY

Well this week is the turn of the letter "B" and what more appropriate than this image. Back in the day when I first met her in a pretty legs contest she was flaunting them. Here she is concealing them a little bit but not really, her legs still looked fine boots and all.

BEAUTY AND THE BOOTS

"B" is also for this Beast that charmed that beauty into his life for a little bit over 30 years.

When I combine the two then I realize that "B" is also for BLESSING which is what she was in my life.

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One Day at a Time... Continued!

What was it about ‘mi chica” that seemed so familiar? It had only been a few weeks since I met her and yet if felt I had known her for a long time. All of a sudden we found ourselves going everywhere together, driving to work together, even going to school together, at least for a while. It was evident that there was a good chemistry there, and if I was a “wannabe player” for “mi chica” I changed my ways.

Me: Baby, I feel like I have known you for a long time.
Mi chica: Why?
Me: I don’t know.
Me: How long have you been coming to Copa?
Mi chica: This is like the second time in a long time.
Mi chica: I came with my best friend but she always disappears on me.
Me: You mean you used to come here a lot before.
Mi chica: No, not really. But there was this one time about a year and a half ago.
Me: Wait a minute, did you say a year and a half ago?
Mi chica: Yes!
Was I living a “Twilight Zone” moment? Wasn’t it about a year and a half ago that Jesse brought me to Copa for the first time? I wonder if…

Me: I used to go to another disco in Long Beach and only been coming here recently. But I was also here once about a year and a half ago. My friend brought me. It was my first time ever at a disco.
Mi chica: I came with my cousins and her crazy friends. They were a wild bunch.
Me: When I came with Jesse it was on a Friday night and it was kind of empty. We were going to leave but they were having a pretty legs contest and…
Mi chica: What?
Me: A leg contest.
Mi chica: I know what you said. I was here that night.
Me: Really!
Mi chica: Yes, there was a leg contest and there were only two girls. So…
Mi chica: My cousin undress me and sent me in wearing only my leotards and my…

I couldn’t believe what I was hearing, my Goddess from the leg contest, the one that took my vote, the one that made me take my eyes out from my sockets so I could wipe them clean, the one that made me howl like a Mexican wolf auuuuuuuuuuuuuuu. Yes now I remember, no wonder she looked so familiar, no wonder I felt I had known her. I guess my subconscious always remember her even if I didn’t recognized her immediately, but you can’t blame me because on that Friday night my eyes were focused on… well you know on what… her legs!

Me: That was you? No wonder you looked so familiar.
(Coincidence, I say not… it was fate, it was meant to be.)
Me: Boy you came prepared to win that night, even though you came in second.
Mi chica: No! I was dressed but my cousin remembered I was wearing the leotards and… And she made me take off my skirt.
Me: Well, if you must know I went home with no voice that night I was screaming so loud. I was cheering for you.
Me: I can’t believe what I’m hearing.
Mi chica: Me neither.

Actually as I write this and go back in time, on my mind, I still can’t believe it. Here we are almost 27 years later and the memory is still so vivid in my mind. It’s memories like this that make me want to live one day at a time so that I can put them in my memory bank and to be able to retrieve any time I want. I want to live one day at a time and don’t want to miss a minute of it.

Me and "mi chica". back in the day.
Thanks Becca for supplying this awesome image.
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Adapating to Changes

The house is quiet at night and so my bad habit of going to bed late is slowly changing. There's only so much computer and TV I can do so going to bed earlier than I was accustomed is kind of a new trend with me. The downside is that by 6:30 or seven in the morning I'm up and awake. Yes definitely not the Melo style at all.

So Saturday again I woke up at 6:00 a.m. I told myself I would be crazy to get up that early on a Saturday so I convinced myself to stay in bed. Then I woke up at seven, again I told myself, "Self stay in bed" and so I did. Then I woke up at 7:30 and I finally gave up so I got up and that was that.

First thing was to make me a coffee, umm coffee in the morning is the best. Then I went to the computer to check on facebook and emails but the Internet wouldn't open so I decided to go and take a bicycle ride. It was nippy at first eventually I warmed up, my hands remained cold throughout the whole ride tho. I would say about an hour and a half later I was back at home.

I came home and showered and then I was out to get me a haircut. After that went to check a new gym that just opened, and then I went back home. My gardener came to do my grass and so I run to the bank to get him his cash. Wow, I did so much and at this point it wasn't even noon.

This are my famous "Huevos a la Mexicana"
I got hungry so Daddy Master Chef got in the kitchen again and cooked himself some "Huevos a la Mexicana" which are totally different from "Huevos Rancheros" It was delicious, as a dessert I got a banana, cut it in little circles and put it in a pan with some butter and I put some sugar on top to get it caramelized. I say that was the perfect lunch. I said it once and I'll say it again, this kid is not going hungry any time soon.

Here it is, lunch and dessert all prepared by yours truly.
I am finding out that I am only cooking for me on Monday afternoon and Saturday morning, the rest of the week my mom and Michelle have my back. Oh my Sister Elena hooks me up with dinner after mass. I know I am just one lucky son of a gun, but what can I say, they love me, they really love me.

I also attacked the kitchen tonight. I decided I would make me some lunch for tomorrow. The plan was to make "Huevos con ejotes y chorizo" (Eggs with string beans and chorizo) I had already started cooking when I noticed that my can opener was gone, a quick phone call confirmed my suspicions. Yes, Michelle had taken it so a quick thinking mind such as mine adjusted to the situation really quickn and opted with Huevos con chorizo, onions and a salsita to die for that my sister gave me last week.

So... Anybody out there reading this I'll appreciate your recipes for an easy yet tasty lunch for Saturday or dinner for Monday. I am usually really good a following directions. I want to try different dishes and I am willing to be my own guinea pig and trying them on me first. lol

And this is my lunch for Monday at work. Again, mi chica would be proud.

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One Day at a Time -- Un Dia a la Vez

I know you are all aware and it may not seem like it but today's marks the first month mi chica is up with the angels. ***sigh*** time sure flies, let's not waste any more of it.

It's getting closer to where I am running out of excerpts from "Life's a Dance" so I hope I didn't bore you with the repetition of some of the things I wrote some five years ago. Everything you've been reading from "Life's a Dance" I applied to my daily life and trust me it payed big dividends. The subtotals yield many laughs and good times, but the grand total was pure happiness.

ONE DAY AT A TIME

Why all of a sudden I keep writing about how good I have it? Why do I make it sound so easy? Why not before? What has changed? What’s different? These are all valid questions that I ask myself. I figure you’re wondering too. It’s all about choices and what you want, when we hit bottom we had the choice to call it quits and we had the choice to keep going and make it work. When we decided to keep going we obviously saw that it was worth fighting to make it work and to succeed. So once the choice was made we needed to commit to it otherwise we would just be prolonging the inevitable. Our mindsets were adjusted and our new way of thinking became our way of life. It is really not hard at all; I sometimes wonder why we didn’t do it before. I don’t dwell in the past because it is gone now I just see what’s going on today and see where I want to be tomorrow. I set realistic goals and I have realistic expectations, that way I eliminate painful frustrations. If I make it sound too easy it’s because it is. Before I was too dumb to see it but by changing our ways we created the changes to our new beginning and our job now is to maintain these changes and to keep them fresh. Although I do have dreams and ambitions my life is as simple as living it one day at a time:

Un dia a la vez Dios mio
Es lo que pido de ti
Dame la fuerza para vivir
Un dia a la vez
Ayer ya paso Dios mio
Mañana quiza no vendra
Ayudame hoy, yo quiero vivir
Un dia a la vez.

“One day at a time, my God, is what I ask of you. Give me the strength to live one day at a time. Yesterday is gone, my God; tomorrow may never come, help me today, as I want to live one day at a time”. Have you though what can make this day special? If you have, who is included in your day? These are the things that can make or brake your day. It is nice to come up with different things everyday otherwise thing become monotonous and mechanical thus taking all the excitement away from the original design. The choice is yours and it rests in your hands.

Every so often I come across nice articles that shed some light into my sometimes-obscure mind and the following is one that I would like to share with you. Sheri & Bob Stritof wrote the following ten reason husbands and wives want from each other and here they are in no particular order:

Top 10 things wives want from their husbands.

1) Telling her daily that she is loved. Everyone needs to be affirmed. Everyone needs to know that they are loved. The best way to say “I love you” are usually in simple, everyday, seemingly unimportant ways like an unexpected hug or holding hands when you walk together.

2) Understanding and forgiveness. There will be days when your wife will make mistakes or when she’ll be difficult to be around. No one is perfect. She both wants and deserves your willingness to understand and forgive her. Remember that no relationship can be sustained without forgiveness.

3) Conversation. Don’t let your conversations with your wife dwindle to nothing but talk about your kids, your jobs, and the weather. If that happens, your marriage relationship could be in real trouble.

4) Willingness to make time for her and your children. Having quality time with your wife and kids isn’t something that just happens. You have to make it happen by not only making the plans but also by following through. Time with those you love have to be a high priority for you.

5) Saying “Yes” more than saying “No”. Habitual negative responses to your wife and kids can push them away from you. Think twice before saying “no” and you’ll be surprised at how saying “yes” can improve your relationships.


6) Listening well. It’s really disheartening for a wife to share her thoughts and feelings with her mate and then realize that he didn’t actually listened to her. Your wife wants and needs you to not only listen with your ears, but to listen with your hear.

7) Affection and kindness. How often do you say “please” or “thank you” or give your wife an unexpected kiss? Unfortunately, some married couples forget that being kind of affectionate to one another are keys to a successful marriage.

8) Sharing household and child rearing responsibilities. One of the main reasons couples fight is conflict over who are doing what around the house. Chores and childcare are not the sole reasonability of your wife. She shouldn’t have to ask you to do your share around the house.


9) A day off now and then. Give your wife a day of several times a month. This means that she will be free from worrying about what is happening with the kids, the house, the pets, and you. She not only deserves this break in her schedule, she needs it to be emotionally and physically healthy/.


10) Commitment to take care of yourself both physically and emotionally. Many men are notorious for not taking care of themselves when it comes to health issues. This isn’t fair to your wife. She is your lover not your mother. Take responsibility for your own heath concerns.

Top10 things husbands want from their wives.

1) Believe in his capabilities. Many men believe that it’s important for them to protect and provide for those they love. Let him know that you believe in his talents and skills and are supportive of him.

2) Understanding. One of the ways you can both tell and show your husband that you want to understand him is by making a commitment to daily dialog with him. Daily dialog only takes 20 minutes off your day. Isn’t your husband worth 20 minutes each day?

3) Affirmation of his accomplishments. Most guys like to be padded in the back. Compliment your husband often. Just don’t over do it with sicky sweet oozes of how great he is. That type of affirmation will backfire.

4) Acceptance. Many husbands are hurt and angered when their wives try to change them. Realize that the only person you can change is yourself.

5) Less Chatter. If your husband is tired, or involved with a project, and you really need to talk to him about something, get to the point. If he needs the details of the topic, he’ll ask for them.

6) Affection. Hold your husband’s hand in public, leave a message of love on his voice mail, massage his shoulders, give him an unexpected kiss. Men like to be romanced too!

7) Respect. Show respect to your husband by not making negative comments about his thought and opinions, by being considerate of his plans, and by avoiding the “eye roll” when listening to him.

8) Free time. Most everyone needs some quiet time alone, and time to re-energize, regroup, and reconnect. When your husband first gets home from work, allow him some free time to unwind if he thinks he needs it. Don’t over-schedule his days off with projects around the house.

9) Trust. Trust is vital in the success of marriage. If you are having doubts about your husband and find it difficult to trust him, seek counseling and not spying.

10) To be a companion. Hopefully, you can say that your husband is not only your lover, but also your friend. Staying friends and companions through the years requires that you find ways to make time together and to do things together.

I would come up with a better list of the 10 top things men want from their wives, than the one from Sheri and Bob. My list would look something like this:

1) Food
2) Whoopee
3) Food
4) Whoopee
5) Food
6) Whoopee
7) Food
8) Whoopee
9) Food
10) And more whoopee!

As you can see my list is a lot simpler and not so complicated. All kiddin’ aside, I have been applying a lot of these simple things and it has been working pretty good. I just hope that “mi chica” agrees. Once again the nice thing about it is that there’s always room for improvement. The goal is to always improve and not stay stagnant on our ways. Once we found our rhythm it’s up to us to up or down the tempo. After all isn’t life a dance we learn as we go, sometimes she leads and sometimes I follow, never worrying about what we don’t know because life’s a dance we learn as we go.

TO BE CONTINUED...

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Gimme shelter

Although we've lived in Mexico four years now, we've always been on the boat somewhere on the coast farther south this time of year, so this is my first taste of San Carlos in late January. Yesterday, even though there were patches of blue sky we had winds up to 56 knots that stirred up big dust storms everywhere (I felt bad for anyone who had to work outside). Then last night the rains began, with lightning blowing out power transformers. The lights blinked off so many times, I carried a candle and lighter with me everywhere I went. (Where IS that #%&# flashlight?) This morning a steady flow of water was creeping under my new back door, splashing down from the roof tiles. Plans to build a ramada over the back patio have shot up the priority list a few notches. 

Here's a shot of the surf yesterday afternoon.

Angel

I told my friend Wanda that I would try playing the ABC Wednesday game and since they are starting with the letter "A" here's my entry. I have never played it before so hopefully I will get better as I go.

My first entry will be the letter "A":

ANGEL

Heaven needed one more Angel and so did we. For the first time ever our Christmas tree was topped with this pretty Christmas Angel. For many years we had used this funny looking shinny gold star.

You will always be our Angel
In the morning or late at night
Spreading us with all your wisdom
Guiding as my shiny star
Yes, we miss your glowing presence
Yes, we miss you are not with us
Yet we accept that in God's glory
You will always be in our hears.

To see other participants in ABC Wednesday, check our mrsnesbitt's space. Maybe you'd like to join this year and post your ABC pictures.

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Choices

Another excerpt from "Life's a Dance"

I truly believe that you are the director of your orchestra and the choreographer of your dance. God created our destiny and showed us the path to find it, but he didn’t make it easy for us, he placed many detours and gave us the ability to make choices, it is then up to us to make the right choices, and to learn from those times when we didn’t make them. I love music so to me life’s a dance, but the same principle can be applied to fit your profile, what if you don’t like music but like sports instead. Then you can say that life’s a sport. It doesn’t matter what you chose.

Going back to what I said before about MTV or what Chris Rock talked about in his stand up routine about Rap Music, if you say to me that it doesn’t really make a difference that such shows or such music doesn’t influence the way our new generation think, that’s ok, I used to say the same thing to my parents about my music but the bottom line is this; it doesn’t help to live in denial. TV creates our role models more than real life itself, and we will follow their examples. I remember when the movie “The Fast and the Furious” came out, I was wondering if it was any good and my son had just seen it the previous weekend. I still remember his comment “Dad, the movie is good, but if you want to go see it go during the week when less kids go see it because when they leave the theatre they think they are speed racers and they start burning tires and driving crazy”. It wasn’t any different back in my days either, I remember one night my brother in law and I went to see a movie called “Against all odds”, in this movie there is a scene where these two guys race on the streets from West L.A. to Hollywood, one of them drove a Porsche 911 and the other a Ferrari. On the drive back home as we were driving through China Town at around 11:00 p.m. these guys in a Cougar started revving up the engine while at a red light, and my brother in law was not going to shy away from these fools, after all he had just bought his Camaro Z28 with a five speed manual transmission and a V8 under the hood. So yes we got to relive the scene from the movie ourselves and I thought I was going to shit in my pants every time I saw a red light approaching and my brother in law would not even slow down. Oh but TV and movies do not influence us… yeah right!


Yes, we let ourselves be influenced by the media, but it is ultimately up to us to make the choice, which requires our exercise of judgment. Life’s a dance you learn as you go, most dancers realize that you don’t need a huge hall or a discotheque to dance, it doesn’t matter where you dance because the pleasure is in the dance itself, so if you learn how to dance you will dance anywhere. Live by this and you will always enjoy the dance even if you have no rhythm.

Look for the good
Some of us may be undergoing great hardships. But no life is so difficult that it cannot be made better by improving our attitude. No matter how dire the circumstances, if you look for some good, you will find it. But how can we find anything good if we occupy our time complaining? The rule to remember is that we are certain to find what we look for. If we search for good, we will find it. If we search for something to complain about, we will surely find it. Choose to search for good. And choose to believe something good can and will happen. Choose to live with hope, rather than despair. Don’t be a dope. Learn to cope. Live with hope.

I of course didn’t write that, but I couldn’t have said it better myself. When it comes to choices it is our duty to search for the good things, and to cope when things don’t go our way.

Unfortunately my not so rookie is undergoing great hardships, and I truly hope that in the middle of all this he can find some good so that soon he can cope with what’s ahead. I wish he’ll search deep and far into his soul so that he too can believe that something good can and will happen and to keep a good attitude and actually improve it because now the outcome of his children depend on it. He has the greatest support a man will ever need and that is the support of his family.

TO BE CONTINUED...

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Food and I

Today I came home extremely hungry again, all I had for lunch was a canned Campbell's chicken soup I bought at the store. So, as soon as I stepped into the house I headed for the kitchen.

My refrigerator is nearly empty because I only eat here on Monday and Friday, the weekend doesn't count because my daughter's come here and they either bring food or we go and get what we need. Anyway, I did find two tomatoes, onions, hot jalapeño peppers, cilantro, and a pack of sirloin steaks. This to me had the makings of a good meal.

So, I put them to defrost, and while I waited I made a salsa with the tomatoes and stuff I found. Now I can make a mean salsa so today was not the exception. Steaks were defrosted so I put them in the pan and started to cook them. I let them get brown and crispy but not burned and then I added the salsa and let it boil.

Oh yeah, a little salt, a little, paprica, and some oregano...
The end result was pure tasty heaven. Living with a woman that was a master in the kitchen something was bound to rub off. Mi chica would be proud not doubt about that. Last week I made some huevos con chorizo and I didn't throw away the oil/grease from that day so I put it into another pan and then re fry half a can of beans I had.

The end result not only looked good but tasted good too.

Now, be honest and tell me this doesn't look delicious.
I had enough to pack me a lunch for tomorrow. I am covered and I won't go hungry anytime soon. Tomorrow my mom will send me off with home made burritos for Wednesday except I will be going to Z-Tejas on Wednesday with a trucking company rep. That meas that the burritos will probably last me one for Thursday and the other for Friday. Wow, food has a way of finding me so easily.

I must not have liked it.


Ummmmmm que rico!

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Hubcap Grill: The Burger as Art

I’m no burger expert. I prolly eat about five burgers a year -- or definitely fewer than ten. I just don’t crave them like so many of you ravenous beef hunters do. I mean, they’re good and all, but so’s macaroni and cheese. Sheesh.

Within minutes of opening, Hubcap Grill, the diminutive downtown burger joint, had a slew of supporters and longer lines than the MFAH on free day. It was everyone’s favorite new place, nearly universally loved. The patties! The toppings! The composition! But come ON -- It’s *just* a burger, I thought to myself, though was secretly intrigued by anyone that could artfully combine burger with Frito Pie. [chin scratch]

Wouldntcha know. This past Saturday morning I tweeted that I was looking forward to my first ever visit to Hubcap Grill, and immediately received a dozen responses, most of which explained that I had to get this burger or that burger, be sure to try the fries, and don’t forget to say hi to Ricky, the amiable owner. Inspired by the outpouring of Hubcap evangelism, my excitement grew as I silently hoped my expectations weren’t growing out of control. It’s *just* a burger, I privately reminded myself.


Turns out, these are not *just* burgers. They are meaty buns of art, the carnivorous form of Monet’s Water Lilies, a Picasso among impostors. I loved the bacon cheeseburger with its thin patty that creates the ideal ratio between grilled meat and chopped toppings. I loved the Philly Cheese Steak burger, crowned with thin-sliced ribeye steak and melted Swiss cheese. I loved the buns, lightly toasted to offer just the right crunch. And I loved the atmosphere, which melds families, yupsters, athletes, hipsters, youngsters, old folks, Americans and non, and people from all walks of life, all gnoshing content in close comfort. What a delicious palette.

My 2010 burger total just might double.

The Perfect Couple

Here is another excerpt from Life's a Dance. This was written after we attended a wedding my mom got invited to and we had one of the best times of our lives.

We had the opportunity to attend the wedding of a couple we didn’t even know. As we enter the church you really could see how much thought was put into this wedding and into the celebration as a whole. Every end of each pew had a ribbon and a bow. A harp was played as we waited for the celebration to begin, and the sound it emitted was very beautiful. As the procession started a trio of kids played the Wedding March and even though at times they were way off tune I don’t think that the bride and groom or the people attending the ceremony cared. In that particular moment it just didn’t matter, the sound was special never the less. Every female in the procession held a beautiful bouquet of yellow roses. The bride being Mexican and the groom Caucasian, a bilingual mass was prepared complete with what seemed to be the church’s choir singing both in English and Spanish and while the couple offered the bouquet of flowers to the Virgin Mary, a soloist sang a most beautiful rendition of the Ave Maria. (I think it’s safe to say we all got goose bumps) “How can some people think that getting married is not important enough?” is what I asked my wife as we just sat there absorbing the whole thing. We certainly have been to lots of weddings, that by no means was the first one or the most beautiful one, however there was a certain thing in that wedding that to me was special, the couple getting married were not young anymore, were they old? Not really but let’s say that their teen years were left behind a long time ago. I couldn’t help but think that this couple may not have a chance to celebrate a Silver Anniversary so maybe they’ll celebrate each and every anniversary with a different passion than most.

Now, here we are “mi chica” and I get the chance to see the first 25 years go swooshing over our heads because to me it feels as if it was yesterday when we said, “I do”. As we exchanged comments we both realize that we have in fact traveled over a bumpy road full of ups and downs and through it all we have made the necessary adjustments needed to continue on our journey. Some of the things that we encountered while on that road were:

Our kids came first – Yes they did, heck to a certain point they still do. Once a parent always a parent, the key here was and still is that once they went to sleep they did not exist until the following day, the night was ours to use as we may. One bed for two of us, never one bed for two of us and three of them.

Get a life – Hobbies and things to do when I’m with you. Weather it was the CB radio and the endless parties known to us as “convivios”, or Salsa dancing every Wednesday night, or joining a car or motorcycle club and riding together or the wonderful weekend getaways we used to have to Solvang, we always made sure we had time for us and I mean just us. Yes our kids came first but that’s why every so often we had to leave them behind.

Ours jobs – No doubt having a good reliable job is of great importance, thanks to my job I have a roof over our heads and food to put on the table, can’t neglect it, can’t put it aside, after all we spend more of our awake time there than at home. However my job can not and will not ever be the most important part of my life. I can replace a job with no problem whatsoever, but my family is irreplaceable, therefore making family my number one priority.

Have your fights once in a while – Because it’s so worth it making up. There’s just no two ways about it every now and then we will disagree. What? You didn’t expect for everything to be perfect, did you? I didn’t think so. An since It Takes Two to Tango, make sure your spouse is taken care of first and foremost, otherwise you’ll be tangoing by yourself and all the sub-important things above mentioned won’t seem as important any more.

Learn to say “I’m sorry” – Even though sorry seems to be the hardest word. It is also one we don’t say either soon or often enough. Just make sure you mean it when you say it. If you mean it but don’t say it, it’s no good, if you say it but don’t mean it, it’s no good either, so do a soul search and do the right thing. In the end it will pay you huge dividends if you do.

TO BE CONTINUED...

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Maybe this time…

I've long thought of myself as having a brown thumb, but somehow I keep being drawn back into garden dreams.


Wandering through tianguis (the weekly Guaymas swap meet) on Wednesday I found a streetcorner salesman with lilies and poppies. Plants had been on my mind, and I couldn't take my eyes off the orange lilies in their little red-painted pots, already blooming in clusters of three and four glorious blossoms. Tiger lilies? They did have a few little freckles on their petals. I scooped up just one, to see if I could find a spot in my little yard for it. I'm a timid gardener, with very little history of success in keeping plants alive. And besides, my yard is surrounded with pink oleander, would orange lilies look really gauche there?


Flowers always make me feel rich. I used to buy cut flowers, and when the Capt was traveling and I was home alone, he would sometimes send me flower arrangements, always a thrill. But blooming plants are better by far, because they offer not only their initial beauty but the challenge of helping them thrive and propagate. It's like adopting a new pet.



For over a decade I've either been on the boat for months or lived in an apartment with no patch of dirt, so plants didn't have much of a chance in my life. But here I am, ready to try again, Googling for gardening guidance. Hope springs eternal.

Another Busy Saturday

So, today I woke up at 7:00 a.m. got up and was ready to start my day. So far I don't mind waking up this early on a Saturday I had a small "to do" list and I tackled it first thing in the morning.

First order of business was to make me a cup coffee and sip on it while I checked my emails and facebook, then the house cleaning started. I have cleaned the house somewhat but had not mopped in about a month so today was the day. Now it smells clean with a hint of pine sol.

My daughter got tickets to the Home and Garden show so we planned on going except the van decided to have it's brakes totally worn out to the point where it sounded like metal was rubbing metal. Not too good a sound when you press on that brake pedal. So I called my father in law and he agreed to come and fix them but he couldn't give me a specific time.

I went to pick up my daughter as I told her that even if we didn't go to the show her and ducky could spend the day with me. When I came back 45 minutes later I found my father in law already working on the brakes. Luckily they were covered under the life time warranty so I didn't pay for the replacements, but I did have to dish out a hundred bucks to replace the very worn out rotors.


It didn't take him long to install them so by 2;30 p.m. we were on our way to the fair. We spend roughly about three hours there and must have walked quite a few miles, bought a couple of gadgets and came back with many dreams and ideas of how we would like the house to look.

Immediately after coming home we left for my sister's house. Her husband and daughter were celebrating their birthdays and they had carne asada, chicken, and an array of sides such as rice, salads, beans, etc, etc, etc. All good stuff. As always the house was full of family and an endless amount of little ones running around.

I was already too tired from running around all day so I decided to bail and came back home where now I'm relaxing, blogging, and sipping on my coffee.

While we waited for my father in law to finish with the brakes, my graddson "Ducky" and I played catch for a while.

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To My Kids

It seems to me my kids are struggling to not having their mom around anymore. This breaks my heart but I know they will come out of it too. Mi chica and I had such beautiful relationship that for me it's easy to draw from there and use it as my strength. It's obvious I miss her physical presence but after 31 years of being together she pretty much lives and will continue to live in my heart and my soul.

Memories, mostly good pop in my head and make me smile. I was watching the slide show I posted here not too long ago and I caught myself smiling while looking at her, and I know in my heart of hearts that she will be OK as long as we are OK.

To all my kids: If you are reading this just ask yourself, did she hate what I am doing right now? If the answer is yes, I hope you have a way and the strength to correct what ever it is. One thing she would totally hate is for any of us to do something we very well knew she hated and blame it on her not being here and or because we miss her so much. To honor her memory is to honor her wishes and to address the concerns she had towards us.

Me: “Oh no that’s my favorite song.” --- “Love disco style”
Cyclone: “Well, go dance it.”
Me: “But I have been dancing all night, there’s a girl go ask her to dance with you.”
Cyclone: “You go ask her,”
Me: “Come on fool don’t be a scary cat you haven’t dance all night.”
Cyclone: “You go ask her, look she’s looking for someone, she wants to dance and she is cute too.”
Me: “You are right, wait for me I’ll be back”

Me: “Would you like to dance.”
Chica: (she wasn’t “mi chica” back then) Yesssss.
Me: “Cool let’s go”.

Well we started dancing back then and we haven’t sopped yet. I wonder if Cyclone is still waiting for me, after all I told him I would be right back. But this “chica” swept me off my feet and took me away. Our life has been a roller coaster but that’s exactly what has made it so exciting, just like no one ride feels the same, well no one day has been the same, sure some are similar but for the most part each day has been unique in it’s own way.

So what was it? Was it the lyrics of the song? Or was it the name of the band that sang the song. “Erotic Drum Band” Hummmmmmm!!! Oh baby you know, (even though I just met you), you know I love you, (I was stretching it a little). But I wanna know (here’s the catch). I wanna know if you love me too (say yessssss). And take me into your paradise… Ok, I don’t know about paradise but where we are is ideal and lovely so I guess it’s close to it. (Ok, it’s kindda chaotic and crazy right now but it’s our paradise never the less). Who would have known back then that this particular song would launch us into many years of dancing, to this day every time I hear this song it takes me back and if I close my eyes it feels as if it was yesterday. Isn’t if funny how time works, if you ask me right now “what will you be doing 25 years from now?” I would probably say that 25 years is so far away, but ask me about 25 years ago and in many cases it’s as if it was yesterday.

Flashback:

Ray (my ex-manager): So you are getting married?
Me: Si (I didn’t speak that much English back then, remember)
Ray: I was married too.
Me: What happened?
Ray: Didn’t work out.
Me: Sorry to hear that.
Ray: Don’t be
Me: OK
Ray: I give you no more than two years.
Me: Shut the hell up, I will last more than two years.
Me again: Now shut up and eat your burrito.
*Ray, wherever you are, here’s an FYI; it’s now 25 years and counting.

I don’t think there is anything out there better than lemonade when it comes to refreshing ones thirst. So why do they associate lemons with things gone badly. Is it the “sour” part of it? I guess that’s why they say that if life gives you lemons (which are sour), make lemonade (which taste great). The outlook on life, the outlook of things sometimes may present itself in a sour state, it is up to us to change things around and turn sourness into sweetness. “Mi chica” sometimes attracts sour comments, which at first hurt so much not because of the abrasiveness of them, but because of the people that say them. The other day as I said good night “mi chica” told me about a comment that came her way totally unexpected and may I add uncalled for. “What is it about me that attract these comments?” Why me? What have I ever done to deserve them? All I do is help. Now I am at a “screw you suckers” mode/attitude. Can’t say I blame you baby, 25 years with you have thought me a lot, 25 years with you have shown me a lot. You and I are so different and don’t even think alike which in my opinion is why we have been so successful in dealing and coping with each other. As a result we have had a great contrast of ideas and ideals that together have melted in an imaginary pot creating the force of two I spoke about before. If I had to explain to you the “whats ” and the “whys” I would probably had to summarize it in one word, the word being POWERHOUSE.

Gee, I wonder why? People don’t usually attack someone when they are down, so when you are a powerhouse I think it’s safe to assume it’s going to happen. To disseminate the word “powerhouse” if you are a source of influence or inspiration (which at point in life you know you are) not everyone will like that, jealousy may kick in and stupid comments may arise. One having great power (which you do) - (yes, even over your Dad) there will be others that may feel the need to compete against you, even though you didn’t even know such competition existed. One having great drive, energy, or ability. (I feel sorry for those that feel the need to compete with you knowing that you will win hands-down).
If you are ever accused of being a “powerhouse”, proudly just say “guilty as charged”.

I felt the need to write something about this for you baby, just my views and opinions. I know it’s tough but to tell you the truth I don’t really think there would be a real answer. I love your strength because I know tomorrow you will view things differently and will do your part to right what’s wrong to the best of your abilities. But sometimes it does feel good to say “screw you all” doesn’t it.

She's a brick----house
Mighty mighty, just lettin' it all hang out
She's a brick----house
The lady's stacked and that's a fact,
ain't holding nothing back.

She's a brick----house
She's the one, the only one,
who's built like an amazon
We're together everybody knows,
and here's how the story goes.

Well I guess the two first verses of the song “She’s a Brick House” by the Commodores sums it up, “Mi chica” is a brick house, mighty, mighty and holding nothing back. She’s the one, my only one, and we’re together everybody knows and the rest of the story? Well we don’t know how it goes because we are still writing it day by day, hour by hour, minute by minute, and second by second.

If life throws us so many lemons, let’s not waste them and start making lemonade, it really isn’t hard to squeeze them dry. Thank God that life it’s not throwing us onions that for sure would make us cry.

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A Viking funeral in miniature

We gathered at a beachfront house Tuesday at sunset to give our friend Tim what he had requested: a Viking funeral. R had told Tim he doubted anyone had a boat they'd be willing to set afire, but I believe our solution would have given Tim a good laugh.


The morning of the memorial there was some confusion over who would bring the ashes, since we couldn't reach the person who had retrieved them from Hermosillo, and he had said he wouldn't be coming, that he had already said his goodbyes to Tim. We were relieved when he delivered the little box.


It was a clear, balmy evening, perfect for setting off to sea. D had brought a little boat made from the wide, flat material removed from  palm tree trunks, about three feet long, with its ends tied into points to make a canoe. We watched her empty a white cotton bag into the boat and looked at the ashes, remembering his gaptooth grin under his big straw hat, his lanky six-feet-plus now reduced to less than a kilo of substance. We arranged white crysanthemums and purple bouganvillea around the ashes and lit a little candle in the middle.  Someone had brought a poem Tim had written and M read it tearfully. Then we carried the boat down to the water in a little procession. No singing, no praying or chanting. Someone piped up, "Who's got the lighter fluid?"


The beach there is a shelf of rock, an interesting array of tidepools but not the sort of place you'd take off your shoes. We gathered next to the water where someone read the Tennyson poem for Tim, and then K doused the boat and its contents with lighter fluid and set it on fire, while the rest of us murmured cautions. Then K lifted the boat and carried it waist-deep into the water while we threw blossoms into the water behind him. When he first let it go, it seemed to stall in the water, and he called back, "He doesn't want to go." Then it caught some current and began floating away. Someone bemoaned the fact that she'd forgotten her camera, and someone else said she thought it might not have been appropriate to take pictures.


Poetry and a few stray tears aside, it was an unsentimental farewell, the kind where Tim would probably have felt right at home. We stood a long time watching the little boat, its fire flickering as the sun set. Then we trooped back up to the house for dinner and tres leche cake.

When Life Gives You Lemons

Staying at my mom's every Tuesday helps me catch up on my sleep. My mom's house has the power to send me to bed early as it is very peaceful and quiet there. Not to mention I catch up on the many stories she has to tell. One thing is for sure I have been enjoying the time spent with my mom to the fullest.

Not too much going on these days besides the fact that the house is very empty. So not much new stuff to tell you, so I'll just continue posting excerpts of my "Life's a Dance" piece from almost five years ago.

Image borrowed from the Internet.

Come on in, grab a tall glass of Lemonade and make yourself at home while I continue telling you about these thoughts that invade my head and that normally stay there, well that is until now.

When life gave us lemons, we made lemonade. Our lives (mi chica’s and mine) took a turn for the best at the beginning of the millennium. You know that the saying goes “it will have to get worse, before it gets better”, well it did. But someone said that if you are made of the right material a hard fall might result in a higher bounce. I want to believe that we are made of nothing but the best materials, “pura materia prima” if you will. Talking about wake up calls and rude awakenings, well yes, we got ours and again the “no hay mal que por bien no venga” saying proved itself true. With the new millennium we adopted a totally new way of interacting; we opened our minds to new ideas, and opened new lines of communication. All of a sudden we found ourselves tuned to the same wave and thinking along the same lines, we stopped dwelling in the past and moved forward with our new found strength, and newly adopted good attitude. To date life is good and we look forward to each new day with optimism, now we remind ourselves of how much we love each other and have a good and at times comic way of communicating. From the ever popular happy face to the very exclusive “~ito” signature, to singing via email where it doesn’t matter if you are way off tune, it still reads the same. With the new millennium we adopted new ways of communicating and we have made them fun, each time improving our ways a little bit more.

2006 will mark our 25th Wedding Anniversary and I’m thankful for the chance and opportunity to reach such a milestone. We are living an era where moral values are not the top priority on people’s lists and to be able to say that we belong to the 25 year club is very cool indeed. You may think we are bragging about it. Well why not; I believe we earned that right. So in a quick reflection of the first 25 years together I will let Shania Twain summarize it for me:

(When I first saw you, I saw love.
And the first time you touched me, I felt love.
And after all this time, you're still the one I love.)


Looks like we made it
Look how far we've come my baby
We mighta took the long way
We knew we'd get there someday

Bridge:
They said, "I bet they'll never make it"
But just look at us holding on
We're still together still going strong

Chorus:
(You're still the one)
You're still the one I run to
The one that I belong to
You're the one I want for life
(You're still the one)
You're still the one that I love
The only one I dream of
You're still the one I kiss good night

Ain't nothin' better
We beat the odds together
I'm glad we didn't listen
Look at what we would be missin'

I'm so glad we made it
Look how far we've come my baby

I have asked “mi chica” if she is ready for the next 25 and her reply was a reverberant yessss. So without further ado we will be the architects of our own future and will start immediately to lay and execute the plans as they present themselves to us. We are a force of two and we are ready to explore and conquer.

So baby, let’s dance, put on your dancing shoes and dance with me. It is not so hard to do, get with me and follow the rhythm of the next 25 coming years.

TO BE CONTINUED...

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Flower Power

A few years back, I started doing things for “mi chica” that I would not have done before. Simple things like saying “I love you”. “That goes without saying” is what I told myself, or something as simple and easy as it is to buy a bouquet of roses. “What is it about women and flowers?” is what I always asked myself. Well guess what, I stopped asking because I don’t really know that there is an answer to this, however the rewards for bringing her flowers and even a single flower for that matter will go a loooooooong way. I came to the realization that I have difficulty expressing my feelings, so by bringing “mi chica” flowers, I know that they are telling her everything for me. And even though I may widen the gap from time to time, I don’t let it get so wide that she will tell me “You don’t bring me flowers anymore”. However if someone would have told me sooner that flowers are the language of romance, I would have been singing a different tune a long time ago.

So once again, Garth Brooks sings and I listen:

Sometimes late at night
I lie awake and watch her sleeping
She's lost in peaceful dreams
So I turn out the lights and lay there in the dark
And the thought crosses my mind
If I never wake up in the morning
Would she ever doubt the way I feel
About her in my heart
If tomorrow never comes
Will she know how much I loved her
Did I try in every way
To show her every day
That she's my only one
If my time on earth were through
And she must face the world without me
Is the love I gave her in the past
Gonna be enough to last
If tomorrow never comes

What does it cost to buy a bouquet of flowers? How long does it take to send her an email telling her I love you and signing it with a . Did you make sure to kiss her in the morning? No baby, that dress does not make you look fat… really! Scouts honor. (Even though I was never in the scouts) There are so many things one can do and most don’t cost a thing and in return they will take the relationship a long way. And if the old saying is true then be advised that the best things in life are free. And just to quote a little piece of a Kenny Rogers song: “If I could only read her mind she would say. Buy me a rose, call me from work, open the door for me, what would it hurt, show me you love me by the look in your eyes. These are the little things I need the most in my life”. Yes it took me a while to learn this but after all isn’t life a dance we learn as we go.

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Tango

Here is another excerpt from what I wrote four years ago. I used and quoted a lot of songs because as I mentioned before I believe the lyricists have a gift of writing down what in a moment in time we feel. You just have to find that one song that will make you feel like it was written for you. It was based on dancing and songs as my inspiration so for luck of a better title I always have referred to it as "Life's a Dance".

There was some chaos back then and even though it has not disappeared completely at least we are all living in good harmony.

Tango: A ballroom dance of Latin-American origin in 2/4 time with a basic pattern of step-step-step-step-close and characterized by long pauses and stylized body positions; also : the music for this dance.

It sounds like it's an interesting dance, with 2/4 time and a basic pattern of step-step-step and the characterization of long pauses and body positions. Sounds like a dance to be shared, it sounds like a partner is needed, it sounds to me that… (Correct me if I’m wrong but I think I just came up with a new catch phrase) It Takes Two to Tango!
OK, I did not come up with that phrase; it’s actually been around longer than I have. Once I tried to dance a tango at the house while listening to it on the TV as I was watching an old Latin movie with Libertad Lamarque but it really felt silly to be going up and down the den going “tarara tan tan tan tan, chiquibum tarara ta ta tan tan tan tan” by myself, so I have never tried it again but I know that “mi chica” and I may sometime go someplace where tango is played and give it a shot. I know we will because we are together and we love to dance and we always like the challenge of trying to do things that appeal to us and that we haven’t done before. Yes, indeed it definitely takes two to tango.

But what happens when one of the partners just can’t go past that basic step, and the step-step-step pattern is repetitive instead of stylized? Some people may get stuck right after the basic step, and as the dance becomes faster and the moves and position become more intricate they just stop and give up, quitting becomes the easy way out and something that could have been beautiful and fulfilling becomes something of the past, something that you will say “been there, done that” and is now part of my failures list.

There’s also the group of stragglers, the ones that can’t quite get it the first time, or the second or third for that matter but they keep trying, they get stressed because the steps are hard, frustrated because the moves get faster, mad because they feel that they will be putting a check mark in the failures list but yet they keep that mentality of “If you first you don’t succeed, try and try again!”, and when they least expect it, they are dancing to the same tune, at the same pace, with the same rhythm and feeling the total joy of success. This group knows that a month or two from now some of the steps may be forgotten and they will be stepping on each other’s toes. But they already know what to do to bring those steps back and they will repeat the process until once again they dance to the same tune. They will refuse to be repetitive in their dance routine and innovation will be the only way they will allow to keep that routine fresh and enjoyable.

Life is a dance when you do the steps.

Life is a dance! Sometimes life is hard so think of it as a “tango”, it will be easier to learn if you have a partner to share. John Michael Montgomery one of my favorite country singers said it best in his song "Life’s a Dance":

When I was fourteen I was falling fast
For a blue eyed girl in my homeroom class
Trying to find the courage to ask her out
Was like trying to get oil from a waterspout
What she would have said I can't say
I never did ask and she moved away
But I learned something from my blue eyed girl
Sink or swim you gotta give it a whirl

Life's a dance you learn as you go
Sometimes you lead, sometimes you follow
Don't worry about what you don't know
Life’s a dance you learn as you go.

The longer I live the more I believe
You do have to give if you wanna receive
There's a time to listen, a time to talk
And you might have to crawl even after you walk
Had sure things blow up in my face
Seen the long shot, win the race
Been knocked down by the slamming door
Picked myself up and came back for more

Life's a dance you learn as you go
Sometimes you lead, sometimes you follow
Don't worry about what you don't know
Life's a dance you learn as you go

Thank God there was no blue-eyed girl in my life, I was lucky enough to find me a brown eyed one of a kind, I did find the courage to ask her to dance to that classic song “Love Disco Style” and here we are 24 years latter and we still haven’t stopped, keep the music playing and feel free to change the tune. I guess it is true life’s dance and we learn as we go, sometimes she leads, sometimes I follow and if we worry about what we don’t know, who gives a hoot, as long as we are together, we will learn as we go. Yeah we too were knocked down by the slamming door, but we picked ourselves up and came back for more. Yes I think we are two of the straggles kind, and I know we both firmly believe in the “try and try again” part.

The Spanish saying goes, “Nadie sabe lo que tiene, hasta que lo ve perdido” which in this particular train of thought of mine roughly translates into “you don’t really value what you have, until it is gone”, and then you can kick your self in the ass… or worse. Boohoo, boo, boo, I once had her and now she is gone. Did I love her? Did I care? Yes I did, but I never found the courage to tell her. But aren’t women supposed to know this, doesn’t the female intuition switch turns to on automatically. Why should I be verbal about it? Why should I commit? What difference does it make? Be with me or take a hike and see if I care. Do I love you? Do I care? I don’t really know, but what do you think? Just take a wild guess because chances are that your guess will be as good as mine. Well life’s a dance and you want to dance it well, so if you show commitment to your partner you’ll find out that life’s difficulties which may come your way with your perfect rhythm and your fancy step you’ll be dancing to a perfect pattern and it won’t matter if it’s the one that goes step-step-step.

TO BE CONTINUED...

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Saturday

So, this morning I woke up at 7:30 and normally I would have gone back to bed, as many of you may have heard Saturday for me was my "sleep late" day, and when I say late I mean like 12:00 or 1:00 p.m. But the day seemed so nice that I decided against going back to bed and headed for the kitchen instead.

First things first, ummmm can you smell it? Yep, I nice warm cup of coffee to wake up. Let's see make the bed, turn on the computer and check my emails, my facebook, and my blogs, a comment here and a comment there and I was done. What to do now?

I resumed my lunch time walks while at work so why don't I just take my trusty steed and take a ride? It will be good exercise. So I did and I took off. Sweat pants and a sweat shirt was all I needed. Sorry back east friends but even though I know we'll pay for it soon when it gets hot, our weather here in Phoenix is just plane gorgeous. I can't even relate to what you guys are going through with the cold, the now, the wind chill etc.

Image captured at around 9:00 a.m. notice how clear and wonderful the sky is and how awesome my trusty steed looks.

I kept going and a few blocks past the freeway is the Avondale Autoplex. I rode up and down the long street looking at all the cars. It saddens me to see how much the dealers are struggling to stay alive. There are already about three or four dealers that had to close as they did not survive the bad economy last year.

Still it was fun taking pictures while riding around the area.

Ahhh! a steed of a different breed.
Gotta love it. Reduced to $14,000+, convertible and with 20" custom wheels. Sweeeeeeet!
Then I saw this and I thought it would make for an interesting capture.
Then I swung by Coyote Honda hoping to see some bikes and to my surprise they only had ATVs in there, I guess the motorcycle sales were down and now they will concentrate on the all terrain vehicles. I truly hope this bad economy that has been very unkind to many will finally turn around.

The freeway was widened so the bridge had to be reinforced, it took many months to complete this but it's finally done. It looks great and it proudly shows our town's name and our State.

So, I am heading home now and it's still early. Wow, waking up early gives you a chance to do many things. Back home I took the next hour to continue cleaning my garage, another couple of bags filled with garbage and some box shuffling but nothing major there. I will continue to do this regularly, sooner or later I will have that garage the way I want it.

Next I went out to the back yard and decided to water it down. It really needed it and after I was done it really looked nice. The day kept getting nicer and nicer and to prove it I give you these two shots.

A cleaner backyard.
Gorgeous weather.
The floor looked great after it was watered down.
At this time my pictorial will end as my camera decided to stop working. I've had it for over three years and have carried it with me daily, and it's captured thousands of images but I think it's about to finally and completely quit.

I have a $50.00 gift card to a Harley Davidson dealership that was given to me on my birthday so I decided to go to Arrowhead Harley Davidson. I spent a couple of hours there as the sales rep that sold me my bike ten years ago still works there. I had not seen him in over four years so we talked for nearly the two hours I was there. The I walked around the store twice hoping to see something I would like to buy but found nothing so I came home with my gift card still intact.

After all I had done all day I was a little tired so I took a nap but woke up in time to go to my daughter's for enchiladas. Good food, and great company made it for a fabulous ending to a busy and fun Saturday.

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Handyperson's addendum

Some interesting revelations, gracias a Google:

1) Norm, one of my blessed commenters, recommended Tapcon screws for my brick and concrete walls. They're come in a blue rust-resistant coating, just the thing for a flood-prone house (I've found a lot of rusted screws from knee-level down, thanks to Hurricane Jimena). You still have to drill a pilot hole but you don't need to deal with mollies or wooden plugs. What you do need, according to the Tapcon website video, is to make the pilot hole slightly smaller than the screw so it (duh) has something to grip onto. And you need to clean out the hole really well, using one of those twisty wire brushes and a shop vac. Now all I have to figure out is which heads I want: flat recessed or hex. Probably flat recessed for most of my jobs. And I have to find out if they can be bought in Mexico.

2) Finishing nails don't necessarily come individually in pennyweight sizes. My friend Charlie showed me a pack of them, tidily stuck together like staples for the staplegun. They are called air nails and are for nailguns, though you can use them for manual hammering. I've had a hard time finding finishing nails at the ferreteria, but now I know another sort I can look for. Sin cabeza, por favor.


I know I'm probably the last person on the planet to learn about this stuff. Something new to bore you with. But progress is being made, and fun is being had.

Handyperson in training

Resolution #4 on my New Year's list was to "Learn how to use tools and work with bricks, tile, wood and other materials so I can build and fix things." One would think that at my advanced stage of maturity I would have already acquired these skills, but noooo. I remember 20 years ago when I last had my own place and was teaching myself to use tools. I bought a microwave cart in a box and was assembling it out on my back deck. The Capt, a new acquaintance, showed up about then, and wanted to help. I said an extra pair of hands would be helpful, but I wanted to figure it out for myself from the instructions. Nevertheless, somehow in the process the screwdriver ended up in his hand, and I reverted back to my usual ineptness.


As a little girl, I was warned away from my dad's workshop, out of fear I'd 1) break something or 2) hurt myself. I've had a sort of lifelong phobia about tools and repair jobs, forever asking somebody else (usually the guy in my life) to help (i.e. do it for me). For some reason, my little sister didn't receive the parental warnings, or ignored them, and grew up to be an ace repairperson who won't shrink from any challenge.


I want to be like that. I would like to become ept. (I looked it up, there's no such word. You can be inept, but not ept, so they say. Like you can be ruthless, but not ruth. Hapless but not hap.)


Flash forward twenty years, and here I am in my own place again. I have issues with funky electrical connections, crumbly construction, design flaws that are begging to be set right, with the proper tools and materials.

I can hire workers to do a lot of these jobs, but that entails sitting around waiting for them to show up. As anyone who's hired Mexican labor can tell you, mañana doesn't mean tomorrow. And they don't call if they're running late. 

There's a toilet that wants to flush all day if the handle isn't flipped back up. A new drinking water system I dreamed up that requires altering the pantry. Electrical outlets without cover plates. A bicycle with two flat tires. TWO vehicles needing maintenance. And that's just for starters.

Last time we were at Harbor Freight, the Capt patiently helped me assemble the beginnings of a tool kit, including a bright yellow toolbag, pliers, screwdrivers, a nifty fiberglass hammer and a shiny blue power drill.


Thus equipped, a couple of days ago I took out the shelf in the pantry with the power drill, an historic event my friend Kris celebrated by snapping the above photo. Now I'm going to paint it inside with Kilz to prevent mold, then a coat of white. Then with the power drill I'll re-install the shelf a foot higher (remember, I'm working with cement walls here, not wood. This is not as easy as it sounds.) Finally, I'll set my new water jug, with a tap at the bottom, in place and no more flipping five-gallon jugs upside down for me. It's a startling bright orange plastic, like you see at construction sites, but the tap is a lot better than those lever things that break off, spewing water all over your floor.


Next I'm thinking of refinishing my coffee table and end table (on which some fool carved his name long before I bought it). So it's time to look for a sander and learn about varnish. Can't wait!

Twilight and evening bell

A friend in Colorado sent this memorial poem by Alfred, Lord Tennyson, "for my compadre, Tim."

Sunset and evening star,
And one clear call for me!
And may there be no moaning of the bar,
When I put out to sea,
But such a tide as moving seems asleep,
Too full for sound and foam,
When that which drew from out the boundless deep
Turns again home.

Twilight and evening bell,
And after that the dark!
And may there be no sadness of farewell,
When I embark;
For tho' from out our bourne of Time and Place
The flood may bear me far,
I hope to see my Pilot face to face
When I have 
Crost the bar.

Tim's golden legacy

 Cover: Jim Cochran

Our friend Tim, who died New Year's Eve, left behind a legacy for everyone who enjoys reading, and Team Tim has now made it available as an e-book, at SmashWords. In the past year he had finished writing a thriller he called Maya Gold, and brought it to me during the late summer when, unfortunately, I was up to my eyebrows in deadline with our own annual publication. But I delved into it enough to see it had some promise, and the Capt created cover art for it.


I remember a hilarious session one afternoon when the Capt Googled the title Maya Gold to make sure there were no conflicts.


"Tim," he said, "I don't think you want this title. I've found five other Maya Golds, including two books, a TV show... and a Hungarian stripper!" Tim roared with laughter. 


"How about if we change it to Mayan Gold?" the Capt suggested.


"But that's improper usage," Tim protested. "Everybody in Yucatan knows you don't say 'Mayan' but Maya." Still, he agreed to settle on the name change.


I was about 75% through the manuscript on the first pass, to identify areas that needed work and clean up the grammar, spelling and punctuation. The Capt had finished the cover design, which Tim approved enthusiastically. Then Tim got sick, and the rest of his story has been covered in this blog. He's gone now, but while in the hospital he decided he wanted Mayan Gold to be published as an e-book, and one of the Team got busy figuring out the logistics. I finished the first edit, and we settled on the SmashWords online service, which allows us to publish the novel with no upfront costs, make it available for reading on a number of different digital formats including Kindle and iPhone as well as a computer screen, and make it exceedingly cheap. Not just affordable, but cheap.

I've already set up a Wordpress blog to introduce it, at http://tnichol.wordpress.com.  The blog will be a tad rough until I figure out the convoluted bells and whistles of Wordpress, but already contains an excerpt, part of Chapter One that I know Tim particularly enjoyed writing — about sailing a catamaran using ancient Maya navigation. Check it out! Or take the plunge, go buy the book at SmashWords!

Shall We Dance!

The nice thing about writing is that you can always go back to your notes and quote yourself if necessary. That's exactly what I'm doing here. The following is another excerpt from that wannabe book a wrote four years ago. This is from the very first chapter.

The same feelings I had then remained with me and fueled our relationship to where it just kept growing and growing and growing.

Shall we dance! So here I am, it's late at night, and I decided to come and write about something that "mi chica" just told me tonight, just out of the blue and with a sparkle in her eyes she looked at me and simply said "I like you". My eyes opened wide because she caught me off guard, and when I asked her "why you like me?" she simply said to me "just because". As today is the first day of the year all I could say was "Well thank you very much" and then all I could think was what a nice way to start the year.

Last night I was watching a movie that I have watched more than once, if you are thinking it's a dancing movie or movie about dance, you were right. In this particular movie the wife thinks that her husband may be having an affair and she hires a private eye to follow him. They had been married for 18 years and she just couldn't cope with the doubt. To her surprise she finds out that her husband has not been unfaithful to her and tells the private eye that his services will no longer be needed. Now I may not remember the exact words or dialog in the movie but when the private eye asks her about why she cares about being married and having a partner she gave the most beautiful answer.

"Because it is important to have a witness to your life, my life will not be in vain because you are here, and your life will not go un-noticed because I care". Since I wrote this by memory I may have changed the words but the idea is the same.

Well, mi chica, if you must know my answer to you is more like "no, no, no, no, no, no, no, I like you more!" Thank you for caring and being here with me through thick and thin. Thank you for allowing me to be that special witness to your life, and to better yet, to be a part of it. So shall we dance baby? What do you say? As long as you keep the music playing, all I know is that I'm there.

When my personal life is falling in place and the puzzle pieces that are in my life fit so easily, it is not hard to start wishing and wanting the same for everyone around us that we care about and in our case it pretty much means all of you. My wish for you is to feel as good as I do right now and to be able to sing together. A good song from "Queen" that comes to mind would be the one that goes like:

I’ve paid my dues
Time after time
I’ve had my sentence
But committed no crime
And bad mistakes
I’ve made a few
I’ve had my share of sand kicked on my face
But I’ve come through

We are the champions my friend
And we’ll keep on fighting till the end.
We are the champions
We are the champions
No time for losers
‘Cause we are the champions
Of the world.

I’ve taken my bows
And my curtain calls
You brought me fame and fortune and everything that goes with it
I thank you all
But it’s been no bed o roses
No pleasure cruise
I consider it a challenge before the whole human race
And I ain’t gonna lose

We are the champions my friend
And we’ll keep on fighting till the end.
We are the champions
We are the champions
No time for losers
'Cause we are the champions
Of the world.

~~~~~~~~~~

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