I'm about to get on a plane...actually, two planes in a row. I'm nostalgic for the excitement I used to feel when I flew years ago. It's been replaced by a sense of dread, and not because a couple of planes hit the World Trade Center in 2001. Not because I'm afraid of crashing. The skies just aren't very friendly anymore, and the airports are grim scenes reminiscent of high-class penitentiaries, but what do we have to be penitent about? We just shelled out hundreds of dollars for this experience!
Just to add to that feeling of detention, airlines are actually considering clamping "safety bracelets" on every passenger, so if someone makes a threatening move they can be stunned instantly by any flight attendant carrying a remote control. Use of the bracelet will also eliminate the need for boarding passes, so we can all be more efficiently herded onto the plane. They'll probably be sleek devices with the airline logo on them, and the kids will be fascinated. "Can't I take it home with me, Daddy?" But the idea gives me the shivers.
Big deal, you might say. If you behave yourself it should be no problem, right? But all it takes is one thin-skinned flight attendant who decides to play cop, and one mouthy passenger... I know a former flight attendant who used to dope the drinks of passengers who offended him. Everybody was doing it, he said with a shrug.
Anyway, I'm getting this flight over with before they cuff me. Wish me luck.