Learning to Let Go

Zorra used to hang out on the kitchen window ledge for hours

I have a confession to make. Since they were babies I had been feeding a family of feral cats and although they weren't tame, they had grown up relying on me. But I was outvoted by my next-door neighbors and the Capt, all of whom tell me I'm interfering with Mother Nature by putting out kibble for them everyday (not to speak of the times I'd slip chicken, tuna and sardines to them). So I regretfully had to close the free feral cafeteria.

The feeding made it possible to have them neutered, as I'd never have been able to round them up if they weren't expecting food. The problem started when we went cruising and I didn't leave enough kibble for them, not realizing we'd be gone three months. When it ran out they stormed our neighbors, who have their own cat and, therefore, a kibble supply. One of them tore up the neighbors' screens while we were gone, another knocked down a pricey propeller in his workshop and all five were swarming the front door at the crack of dawn every morning. Although they continued to put out water for the ferals, the neighbors were exasperated by the time we got home. They're not really fond of cats other than their own. But thinking of how betrayed and desperate those hungry cats must have felt, I still feel like crying.

The last litter...Zorra didn't get neutered in time and these babies arrived last fall
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"They'll learn to hunt," everyone assures me, "and then we won't have mice anymore." There's a field behind us, one to the side and another one in front, so the mouse population is probably enormous. I try to comfort myself with that thought.

Friendly Zorra, her timid twins, the handsome Felipe, the talkative Chucho...I've seen each of them from time to time, glaring at me like the vile traitor I am, but they all do look healthy. And at least I won't fret about them next time the Capt wants us to head off on a three-month cruise.

The twins, a neighbor cat, Chucho and Felipe at the feeding station

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Yesterday I found a new cat, one I don't have to feed, fix or take to the vet. I was shopping for gadgets to add to my blog and adopted a sweet cybercat. I can even take him cruising, and he won't mark his territory, leave poop or claw the curtains. He purrs if I rub his belly, talks if I touch his nose, blinks and breathes. His pupils dilate, his tail and whiskers twitch, he bats at the cursor and his big green eyes follow it around the page. Best of all, the neighbors won't object to him. If you want one, he's a Google widget called Maukie.

Maybe I should take a hint from the behavior of mother cats. They adopt, feed, raise the babies and eventually wean them and set them free. Here's a sweet mama cat story:

"Newborn red panda (the furball without the stripes) suckling on a domestic cat together with the cat's kittens. The red panda, born June 30 and rejected by its mother soon afterward in Amsterdam's Artis zoo, has been adopted by the domestic cat, the zoo said on July 9, 2008. Red pandas look like raccoons and when fully grown are slightly larger than a domestic cat."